


no more room to grow

by mnemememory



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Gen, Pre-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-01
Updated: 2019-09-01
Packaged: 2020-10-05 04:43:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,302
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20483060
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mnemememory/pseuds/mnemememory
Summary: Vex is small, and scared, and she can’t imagine a world without her brother.(the twins, pre-canon)





	no more room to grow

...

...

**no more room to grow**

...

...

Vex is small, and scared, and she can’t imagine a world without her brother.

“We can’t keep doing this,” he says.

Vex is holding onto his hand tight enough that she can see the blue veins stand out underneath her skin. Her fingers are long, soft. The first time she had seen their father’s hands, she hadn’t understood how they could be so smooth. Vex has been picking off pieces of scar-tissue from her fingers, softened from months without the cut of a bowstring, and she hates how deep the knowledge runs.

“I know,” Vex says. She wishes she didn’t.

“I’d rather die,” Vax says. He’s shaking. Vex can feel him curled up against her shoulder. “I’d rather die than stay here.”

Vex swallows thickly. “This isn’t…Vax…”

Vax just nods and grips her hand even more tightly. He’s gotten so quiet. The first few weeks upon their arrival, there had been a kind of transition period – _Look at us_, he had yelled at the top of his lungs. _Why would you bother to bring us all the way here if you won’t even look at us_?

Their father never had. Vex doesn’t know if she’s relieved or not.

Vax doesn’t talk to anyone but her, now.

Vex’s stomach grumbles, and she tucks her knees closer to her chest to keep from doing something stupid. Like getting up. The house is a maze of passageways and scurrying servants that gave them _looks_ whenever they walked by. Vex would rather go hungry than have their disdainful eyes turned anywhere near her brother. He deserves so much better than this.

Vex breathes in, and out. In, and out. “Okay,” she says, finally.

The sun outside is starting to burst along the horizon, sharding out blood into the cloud-covered sky. The first time Vex had seen the sunset from Vax’s window, she had been mesmerised. She remembers standing by the sill in a daze, eyes wide and chest tight with something she couldn’t name. It feels hateful, now. Everything feels so hateful.

Vax glances over at her. “Okay?”

Vex struggles with the words, even though she knows she has to say them. The thing Vex remembers from their mother saying is, _Listen to your father_. She wants to be sick.

“Okay,” she says. “Let’s go.”

…

…

It’s silly, but Vex had thought –

Well, she had thought that once they were outside Syngorn, once they were away from their father’s house and the servants and the _people_, they would attract so much attention. Vex feels flayed under the stares that people give them.

“It’s okay,” Vax says, and Vex _hates_ it, hates that he has to be the one to reassure her. Every time she tries to do the same for him, it comes out wrong. “It’s okay, Vex, they’re not looking at us.”

“They are,” Vex insists, curling her shoulders towards her chest. She doesn’t like this city. There are too many people. There are always too many people.

“They’re not, I promise,” Vax says. “Look at the crowd. We’re not that interesting. That lady over there has _blue skin_, no one cares what shape our ears are.”

Vex peeks out from underneath the edge of her fringe despite herself. There is indeed a woman with blue skin and elaborately curled horns, dressed in fine silks that sway with every step as she walks through the markets. Vex’s own skin itches underneath her woven leggings. She pauses mid-step, mesmerised, and catches eyes with one of the surrounding merchants.

He gives her a smile, and she shrinks back against Vax. This was such a bad idea.

“We need food,” Vax says, forestalling Vex’s impending panic attack. “And we need people. Being out in the woods for so long isn’t good for us.”

_Isn’t good for you_, Vex hears, and tries not to resent it.

“We don’t have enough money,” Vex says. “Let’s just get what we can and leave.”

“We’re staying the night,” Vax says.

Vex turns to stare at him. “Are you _crazy_?”

Vax grins at her, and it’s so unexpected that Vex can feel an answering smile worm its way across her face before she can stop it. She wipes it away with a quick scowl.

“I’ve been practicing,” Vax says, holding up something for her inspection.

Vex looks at it with narrow eyes. It’s leather, and well-made. When he opens the drawstrings and something glints deep inside, she almost has a heart attack.

“_Where did you get this_?” she says, words low and furious.

“Don’t worry,” Vax says. “He won’t miss it.”

“_Vax_.”

Vax grabs onto Vex’s wrist and pulls her away from the bustling crowds and into a shaded alleyway. The world becomes muffled, even to painfully sharp ears, as the stone walls enclose around them.

“We can’t spend the rest of our lives in the forest,” he says.

Vex clenches her jaw. “Why not?”

“Because I want more for us than that,” Vax says.

“It’s safe there,” Vex says.

“We’re staying the night here,” Vax says. “We can’t – Vex, please, just one night. A bed. A warm meal. A _good_ meal.”

“Excuse you, I’m an excellent cook,” Vex argues, but she’s already lost and she knows it. She’ll do anything for Vax when he says ‘please’.

Vax ducks down slightly so that he’s staring out from his bangs and into her eyes. He’s gotten taller recently, and Vex feels an answering thrill of panic curling deep in her gut. They’ve always been exactly the same height. She doesn’t want to think about what else might have changed.

“Vex'ahlia,” Vax says, very serious. “I promise, no one cares about what we look like. And if they do, I’ll take care of them.”

“Don’t be ridiculous,” Vex says.

“I’m always going to be here to protect you,” Vax says. “I promise.”

Vex rolls her eyes and shoves his shoulder. “You’re such a sap.”

“I’m being serious,” Vax says.

Vex sighs loudly. “Okay,” she gives in. “Fine, let’s go get something to eat and find somewhere to stay. Somewhere _cheap_. I’m doing the haggling, darling, because you’re hopeless when it comes to money.”

Vax happily relinquishes the pouch to her, which she tucks underneath her shirt with a firm pat. Then she turns around and starts to walk towards the main street.

She hesitates just on the edge, where the sunlight marks a line between the alley and the market. Vax doesn’t say anything as she wavers – just gives her a small, firm push.

…

…

(“I’m _so sorry_,” Vex says, teeth gritted as she turns back to glare at her brother.

The man she had just essentially been _pushed into_ gives a careless laugh.

“Don’t worry about it,” he says, already turning away. “It’s a busy place. Things like this happen all the time.”

“I’ll bet,” Vex says. The look she gives Vax promises a swift and painful retribution).

…

…

Vex doesn’t say “I love you” often, but that’s okay, because they both know that she means it.

Vax says “I love you” by stepping in front of a blade. By pushing aside an arrow. By cutting himself open and watching the blood pour to the ground.

“Please stop,” Vex asks, once.

“I can’t,” Vax says.

“This is going to kill you,” Vex says.

“It’ll be worth it.”

Vex shakes her head and presses down harder on the gauze. Vax gives a grunt of pain, but doesn’t otherwise respond, which is irritating. Just to be a bitch Vex does it again.

“I don’t want you to die for me, darling,” she says.

I don’t want you to die, period,” Vax says.

Vex wrinkles her nose. “Stop being obstinate.”

“That’s a big word for someone so stubby,” Vax says.

“I love you,” Vex says. “But you’re an _idiot_.”

Vax just laughs at her.

...

...

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not 100% happy with this, but I wanted to write something for the twins before I watched the oneshot. I love these disasters so much. 
> 
> Vex really felt like a challenge. I'm definitely more comfortable with Vax haha. I think I got some of her by the end of it. Tell if me you guys think so!


End file.
